Because Our Menu Has Changed

by Steve Luria Ablon

Use the telephone keypad.
Transmit your social security,
careful just the last four numbers.
Recall your address, your zip code,
your uncle’s niece’s married name.

Press 1
to pay your bill.
Press 2
to order new service.
Press 3
to make an appointment.
Press 4
to hear special offers.
Press 5
to hear the menu again.
Press 6
for more possibilities.
Press 7
to start over.
Press 8
for the polar icecap of technology.
Press 9
for self sufficiency, don’t ask for help.
Press 10
for Madagascar,
to talk to someone
with time on his hands.