by Ron Padgett

When was the War of 1812 ?
What is the color of the White House ?
In what season do we have fall foliage ?
Where does Louisiana hot sauce come from ?
Who invented the Murphy bed ?
From what country did we get india ink ?
What color are green beans ?
What color is a red herring ?
What animal speaks Pig Latin ?

by Maureen Owen

I sleep on the pull out couch bed to be closer to her at night
Wickedly uncomfortable   lumpy   iron bar structure underneath
the attached tag says “Cloud Mattress”

Nights were the worst.
Tired, she’d begin her panic
“I don’t have enough air.    There’s not enough air in here.
Are the windows open ?    The door ?    Is the fan on ?”
yes to all I’d assure her         but she’d gasp
“I can’t breathe!       Can’t get enough air!
I need the nose thing!”      her request
for the oxygen tube        often she’d not use words
just wild eyed  & arms flinging    gesticulating gasp
once hooked up to the generator      she’d question
“Is it working ?    Is it on ?   I don’t feel any air.    I
don’t hear it!”

I’d check the settings twice        assuring her
“It’s ok      just    breathe”

by Maureen Owen

What’s wrong with me!      why don’t I get better ?
       Calling   “Maureen               Maureen           where are you ? 

Herself awkwardly
counting pills

I cooked dinner
We watched the Giant’s game     She began
having breathing problems     stomach  so hot
I adjust the oxygen nose piece
position the fan
ankles swelling
the night worsens
She wakes     can’t breathe
Is the window open     Is the door open ?
can’t breathe     panic rising
raise oxygen level
give her a Tums and ½ Lasix
prop on pillow balconies     heaped mauve & cotton
rub the lavender and sandalwood lotion on her back and ankles
as dawn blurs the darkness
set her up in the comfortable rocking chair
in the kitchen     another tums     & second Lasix ½
call Nancy     we won’t go to church this morning     no sleep
at 10    she’s up &      coffee     slowly breathing

by Maureen Owen

caregivers log 7.27.19    home in Denver
            mom in Truckee    for a few days    without me

Mom calls
her caregiver didn’t show up
no one has refilled her daily pillbox
she has no pills today

At the kitchen window    I watch
a dinosaur next door hiss & stretch out its metallic neck
scooping deep into soil above a sewage drain pipe
black cords where its mane might be glisten in the torrid
afternoon sun
it sways    rears    trunk up over truck bed    dropping a maw full
of dirt
from its jaws   Rumbling  beeping  scooping  heaving  shaking grit
into the truck bed

My brother calls   in route to ER
mom’s legs swelled up   suddenly   in a couple of hours both legs
he and Jacki sitting right there talking to her
visiting Steve   my ringer was off
declaring infection doctor has put her in the hospital
on antibiotics and back on her diuretics
I have to return   my little break   broken

Some days later
Diana & Alvin pick me up at train station main street Truckee
Arriving at the cabin I find mom out of the hospital but
her legs still severely swollen
she appears aged in the short time I was away   or maybe
I’ve been away long enough that I can notice how frail and pallid
she is
I put things in order
& make coffee   cook dinner   set up pills   wash her jacket   make
prescription calls, etc.
her neediness calls for me   if I’m away more than a minute.
I take a quick shower.  Put her legs
up   prepare clothes, etc. for early church   make her bed   cream
on her back   find 49ers football
game on tv   set her alarm   $ in church envelop
every breath she takes floats
on an audible moan.
she’s glad I’m here        she’s realized        she can’t do it alone