Loser

by Andrei Sen-Senkov
translated by Anna Halberstadt

I was six years old
and there was a special person
who lived in our building
when I was in the courtyard
with the boys
and he would slowly emerge
and slowly pass in the midst
of us playing
we would stop in our tracks
and stop kicking the ball
there was something special about him
not darkness, no
some type of condensed gray
he was not an alcoholic not a crazy mean wizard
not a kind wizard either, by any means

One time I asked mom bravely
who was this guy
she brushed me off and said:
a loser
I’ve never heard the word before
and I did not get it
but got scared
when you are a kid, new words can scare you
when they are tied to mysterious adults
in mysterious ways

I also remember, that he had a Greek name
but of course, I don’t remember it

should I create such a name from scratch
so that you get as scared, as I was at six?