You vow not to steal

by Ronald Koertge

You vow not to steal or if you do it’s
for a really good cause.

Also you won’t brag about it or use it
to be the life of the party.

Still, you can’t help showing up places at
the most electrifying, life–saving moments.

The grateful mayor takes you to dinner.
Gives you his private phone number.

Russian scientists capture you, strap you
to a gurney. The probes fall away.

Your laughter is so hideous and mocking
they vow to embrace democracy.

You’re loved for yourself, though,
not because you’re marvelous.

On your honeymoon, you turn yourself
on and off like a light.

Your new wife smiles ruefully. “Stop being
silly now and come to bed.”